I want to say a huge sorry to begin with for lack of being around your blogs over the past week; everything has been immensely busy! Although, the reaction to the week has brought so many tears to my eyes and I am so proud to say I am part of a brilliant community - especially one that has supported this project! I've realised though, that I have too many posts just to end Anti-Bullying Blog Week today which is why I have decided this will continue through for a few more days - with my Catching Fire Film Review going up on Monday(be warned, there will pretty much be an influx of reviews that week!)
The World from YA Eyes is a feature of mine where I discuss topics that are currently being mentioned; one's that really belong in a futuristic Dystopia. This week, to tie in with #AntiBullyingBW , It's all about bullying!
This is a quite a hard post to write - as your first instinct is to go on a rant about what I really think of bullies. Although, this is a discussion post, and I feel it wouldn't be fair unless I was completely honest about it. So, I've decided to go down the route of why I feel people become bullies, if it is ever justified and why I feel it isn't the answer. Before you start shouting at me, just wait until the end!
I recently was in a position, and if you read the 'Bloggers on Bullying: My Experiences' post you would already know, where I was insulted by the people who I thought were my 'friends.' This is a really hard thing to try to understand, as one minute you were constantly in a conversation and laughing, the next you know you shouldn't say anything as they really wouldn't care. I'm not ever going to say "Bullying is completely justified; I mean, you can't blame people for the way you act" as I will always believe there is a thought-process and most people would know when not to say something offensive. Even so, as these people were my 'friends' I knew what was going on in their personal-lives, and can, in a way, understand why there were so angry, even though I can never recall a time when I have said something to purposefully hurt them. I'm not like that.
I feel like the people who decide someone 'is not good enough' - do not have enough self-esteem themselves. It's so easy to imagine them pretending to give off a threatening presence, and to walk the corridors radiating confidence, when really they have horrible home-lives and the only thing that makes them feel good, is to make someone pay for it. To them, I feel it doesn't matter who. They just want to feel that control. Someone has hurt them, they want to hurt them back and they think it will feel good. Whether it is physical, emotional or verbal abusive, bullying is wrong. There is no doubting that.
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| I have so much love for this quote. |
I can't help but feel that something that needs to happen is that bullies need more support. My guess is you bully someone because you are insecure, and feel, somehow, that they deserve it. There needs to be a two-way street. The people who feel like they are being victimised should feel comfortable to say something, despite threats from the person picking on them. Honestly, do you think these people would scare you into "not saying anything£ if they weren't actually shaking-all-over themselves?
This is why, to stop bullying, I feel we need to offer some-sort of help to those that are the bullies. They do face blame when sometimes they may feel like they have their reasons that nobody else will understand. I know, after a week of tips for victims, I may sound like I'm contradicting myself. However, if those people who felt frustrated to the point where they want to make those who live a slightly better life feel like rubbish, clearly they need somewhere/someone to go to.
I'd like to point out right now, to those that may be out there who are bullying someone, that it is not the answer. Just reading some of the stories that have come out of this week and it can really damage somebody - not just physically. Talk to someone about how you feel. If there's no one at home, try school, if there's no one at school, there are a lot of organisations you can find and I will be posting links on Sunday as part of the Wrap-Up to the week! Let's beat-bullying!
Do you agree that some causes of bullying, to a certain extend, can be justified?
Do you feel that people who are bullies should be able to find help, while not feeling the need to give out threats?
This is actually something I was thinking about earlier in the week. I was reading Finding Your Inner Cherokee and thinking that there should be something similar for bullies, as they are the people who are hurt enough to want to hurt other people. I don't think something exactly like Finding Your Inner Cherokee would work (after all, nobody's going to admit that they're a bully by picking up a self help guide for bullies) but definitely some kind of support is needed for these people.
ReplyDeleteReally interesting post, Sophie :)